Support Your Local TPF-TFU

Dillan came to me yesterday and said, with a hint of pride "Just to let you know, I changed the roll."
"The WHAT?" I snapped, somewhat grasping the concept.
"The TOILET paper roll!" he said.
"You mean, you didn't wait for the Toilet Paper Fairy to replace it?" I said with enough of the nick in my eye to let him know I was about to riff off on this concept. "Yea, he's a BIG guy, cigar in his mouth, plunger instead of a wand; comes out of the back of the toilet. I just assumed that EVERYONE in this house believes in him. After all, no one EVER changed the roll...until today."

Remove the little children from the room (and some adults)...... OK, now that we're alone, and we all understand that the Toilet Paper Fairy does NOT really exist. I am normally the winged creature in this household, bringing happy absorption to all good little believers. You all must know those believers, those leaving the brown cylinder on the roll in wistful anticipation of catching that little imp changing the roll. If you stop believing, you will wind up stranded on the toilet with a pot to piss in but nothing to clean it up with! Linda claims to be on my side, but I frequently find her setting traps for the little fairy in hip waders.

OK, I'm getting out of the business. I'm no friggen leprechaun, no fairy in tights, (well..every once in a while ;)) nor hip waders. We're unionizing the The Toilet Paper Fairies and merging with the Tooth Fairy unions. The TPF-TFU will fight for better working conditions (more stealthy abilities, better 'drugged' targets, vacation, hospitalization for those times that 'Bubba' gets us with the shotgun, etc.). If demands are not met, we will be picketing your child's bedroom as well as bathroom. If that does not work, we have 'muscle' in the form of closet monsters; so if you want to sleep (and sleep alone), you better meet our demands.